In our everyday lives we experience many different feelings and emotions. Some experiences make us feel good and happy, others on the other hand bring sadness, worry, guilt and shame to us. As a result of our experiences in life, we encounter different emotions. Emotions are energy that enters our brain and from here it is distributed almost instantly throughout our whole body.
Every emotion evokes a chemical process within the brain which is also transferred to our body. The life cycle of any emotion lasts approximately 60 to 90 seconds. The emotion happens, has its culmination and is then released from the mind and the body.
To illustrate my point, let me give you an example. Let us suppose you are driving with your car in the country side, feeling great, observing the scenery when all of a sudden a rabbit or a deer jumps out of nowhere and wants to cross the road at a dangerous proximity to your car. You immediately shift in a fear mode because danger appeared on your way and you pressed on the breaks before you even knew it! This is the protective and healthy nature of fear. Fear; as one of our basic emotions; is here to protect us and guard us in front of any danger.
To further illustrate my point, I invite you to imagine yourself driving along the road in this beautiful countryside, and your goal is to reach the town where your business meeting takes place. Because your mind is busy with thoughts about how your presentation at the meeting will go, you do not even notice any of this beauty. You are constantly thinking thoughts of this nature: “What if I forget to mention important things? Will my business partner be convinced to buy? If I do not manage to convince him, I risk losing my job.”
In this instance, you feel fear not because of some real danger that popped on your way, but of a danger which you only anticipate in your thoughts.
And here lies the trick! Irrational fears such as the one described above, are emotions that last more than the natural and healthy 60 to 90 seconds, because they are accompanied with personal stories we attach to them. These emotions are what we call negative emotions or toxic emotions. The chemical process induced by these negative emotions, when “practiced” regularly can even harm our health in the long run.
Therefore, attention folks! We need to do something about this. But what?
Become aware and trap yourself every time you get involved in a negative emotion. Ask yourself this question: “Is this thinking process and anticipation of fearful outcomes serving me?” If not, does it do any good to anyone? If the answer is no to both questions, move on to the second point.
Draw your attention to the present moment. See yourself, as if from the outside. What are you doing? Who are you with? How do you look? What type of a behavior could logically follow if you proceed with your negative thoughts? Will this behavior be of any service to you or your surrounding? If not, move to point three.
Allow yourself to understand the real source and character of this negative emotion, using the explanation above. Once you understand and accept this fact, you no longer feel the need to be obsessed with your negative thinking. Instead, you come back to the present moment and notice all the good things that happened and are still happening around you.
Rest assured that it is to your highest good to dismiss fear and anxiety. When the real moment comes, fear will automatically appear, only for a good reason: to protect you from danger and to save your life.
Thank you for being here and reading this blog. I would love to read your comments related to experiences you had with negative emotions. Is there a negative emotion that you face that is really challenging? No matter how hard you try, you simply cannot get yourself to quit this pattern of thinking. In this case, I invite you to drop me an e-mail, explaining your issue and I will be happy to personally reply.
Until next week, much love and many blessings!