Guilt is an emotion just like any other. Just like we feel anger, fear, anxiety, shame, sadness, for example, we feel guilt. The emotion of guilt is a good emotion and a useful feeling because it is a real opportunity for us to learn new things and discover the truth about life. As long as we remain in the realm of feeling the guilt and understanding the message that it brings, it is a powerful motor for our personal growth and evolution.
If we experience guilt and then cling on to it, meaning that we remind ourselves about this feeling over and over again, we are beginning to condemn ourselves. As soon as we start condemning ourselves, we are in the process of developing guilt as a negative emotion.And I am sure that by now many of us have read or heard about the devastating consequences of negative emotions.The root cause for guilt shame and guilt can be the root cause for anger.
There are times in life when an opportunity is presented when we are called to do or not do something. If doing something is right and appropriate and we have done the action accordingly, then we are satisfied and content. If however we needed to do something and we did not do it or we needed to do nothing and we did something, this is the perfect platform for guilt to arise.
Guilt means that you begin to regret the action or no action on your part.
The more that you regret your behavior, the more you condemn yourself for acting the way you did. You begin to be basically angry with yourself for behaving in such manner and this is guilt in action. Guilt is anger directed at ourselves.
Here are the five principles to be guilt-free:
It is virtually impossible that we will never feel guilt or that we have total control over ourselves, helping us to always make the right choices. Because guilt will arise, we need to effectively deal with it using these five principles:
- Acknowledge your violation – become aware what is it that you did or did not do that is causing you to feel guilty. E.g. You told someone something that made him sad or confused. Even though you did not intend this, it just happened. The other person has a right to feel confusion or sadness because of your demeanor; so acknowledge your wrong deed.
- Admit your wrongdoing – explain to the person that you are aware that your move impacted his feelings. Tell other people if you feel it is appropriate of your misconduct.
- Apologize for your behavior – Say you are sorry to the person and tell other people that you are deeply sorry about this event.
- Forgive yourself – Let go of the event and the unpleasant circumstance. Remove the feelings of guilt from within your being.
- Do not repeat the wrongdoing – be more cautious in the future about you conduct in a similar situation. Here lies the lesson you learned from your feeling of guilt and be very grateful for having this learning opportunity.
There are times, however, when these principles could not be applied as easily as described above. Such might be the case when what we did has more damaging consequences to the person or people involved. In order to correct our guilt, we submit to the five principles and additionally we have to state the following affirmation:
“I am forgiven and my guilt is removed.”
- You need to have faith that you are a wonderful person and that everyone makes mistakes.
- You need to firmly believe and trust that you are a unique person with his own inherent value that is untouched by outer situations and circumstances.
- You need to focus on your strengths and the capacity for love which you possess.
Now I invite you to share in the comment thread below what makes you feel guilty? What is one thing that is bothering you now and causes you to trade your peace for feelings of guilt?
I would love to receive your comments and I look forward to offering you my sincere reply,
Much Love and Many Blessings,